Most women experience their highest sex drive during ovulation, which usually happens right in the middle of the cycle.
She may also often see a secondary spike in libido just before or even during the actual period.
If you are trying to track this for yourself or a partner, the most important thing to understand is that it all comes down to the shifting balance of estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone.
Around day 14 of a standard 28 day cycle, estrogen and testosterone both peak. This is when the body is prepping for ovulation. Nature is pretty smart about it. It basically turns up the dial on desire right when you are most fertile to encourage reproduction.
Research shows that during this time, blood flow to the pelvic region increases, which makes everything more sensitive and responsive. If you are a guy trying to be supportive, this is usually the phase where your partner might be initiating more or just seems more receptive to physical touch.
Then you have the luteal phase, which is the week or so leading up to the period. This is when progesterone starts to dominate. For a lot of people, this is a total mood killer. Progesterone is like the “pro-gestation” hormone. It wants you to stay on the couch, eat snacks, and be cozy. It is often linked with PMS, bloating, and breast tenderness, which obviously makes sex the last thing on your mind.
However, there is a weird phenomenon right before the period starts where some women get a big surge in desire again. Some people think it is because the pelvic area gets heavy and congested with blood before the flow starts, which creates a kind of physical pressure that feels like arousal. Others think it is just the sudden drop in progesterone allowing the libido to “wake up” again.
Every body is different though. If she is feeling crappy and crampy, that might actually be the time she needs that physical connection most.
If you are a guy trying to keep up with all this, it can be a lot to remember. I know a few guys who use DuoSync, which is a period tracker designed for men. It lets you see where your partner is in her cycle so you aren’t guessing why she is suddenly super affectionate or why she wants to be left alone.
Download the DuoSync app to grow closer to your partner.
It is really all about communication. My partner and I just talk about it. You can’t really go wrong if you just pay attention to the patterns.
FAQ
Does birth control change when women want sex most during their cycle?
Yes, it definitely can. Hormonal birth control like the pill or the implant works by stopping ovulation and keeping your hormones at a steady level. This means you don’t get those natural “spikes” in estrogen and testosterone. Some women find their libido stays the same all month, while others feel like it lowers their drive overall.
Is it normal to want sex more on your period?
It is totally normal. Between the increased blood flow to the area and the need for natural pain relief from cramps, many women find they are actually more sensitive and aroused during their period. Plus, for some, the extra lubrication makes things more comfortable.
How can I tell if my partner is ovulating?
Beyond just using a tracker, you might notice she has more energy, seems more flirtatious, or even smells slightly different to you. It is a biological thing. If she uses an app like DuoSync, you can just check your phone and see exactly where she is at without making it a whole conversation.
Why does my drive crash right before my period?
That is usually thanks to progesterone. It is a calming hormone that can make you feel sleepy or even a bit low. When you combine that with bloating and mood swings, it is very common for libido to take a backseat to self care and rest.